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I'm A Stranger

Joshua Caldwell

Disclaimer:


This post is not about:


  • Diminishing non-traditional avenues of becoming a Parent.
  • Diminishing the relationship that develops between child and parent. 


I'm speaking directly to the phenomenon that occurs between a child and their birther.


The connection that exists when one being births another. For a long while, that child cannot distinguish between itself and its birther.


They are one in the same.


Upon the birth of our child in 2019; we would have the silver lining of COVID allowing us to spend the first 24 months of their lives with them all day. Not many people in the United States can say they get that much time with their newborn, even with Maternity Leave (Six weeks is not enough time to nurture that relationship)


When they were able to distinguish people and objects, I was the first stranger they met.


"Hello Little One, I'm Joshua, Your Daddy"

Needing to return to work; Jessica left after two years, leaving them in the hands of that former stranger.


A hard decision on the surface, exacerbated by the atypical gender roles we assumed in co-parenting and within patriarchal capitalism.


"Where's Mama?!"

"Daddy's no fun, wheres Mama?"
"Me like Mama better!"





A book titled the profiteers by christopher marquis

Book Review: The Profiteers

By Joshua Caldwell • July 31, 2024
How Business Privatizes Profits and Socializes Costs

Marble

By Joshua Caldwell • August 26, 2023
A Poem

I'm Just Ken

By Joshua Caldwell • August 17, 2023
“Ken is the REAL Villain of Barbie” “Mattel’s CEO was villainized and people now LOVE Mattel” I’ve been toiling with what I wanted to write about this movie, that hasn’t already been said, and I’ve read a few reviews that oscillate between the above two concepts. Within the prototypical story structure we have hero and villain. Especially for the Western Audience. What Gerwin and Baumbach do so deftly here is steer both characters in and out of that role, because Gosling’s Ken and Ferrel’s CEO are not the villains.  Patriarchy is. How the CEO and Ken present are amalgams; ciphers for the ways that a codified oppressive system, in this case patriarchy, affect an individual and how that individual may react. These characters then exhibit the various ways we can codify oppression overtly and covertly. An apt way to look at the dispersion of oppression, and how it manifests. An oppressive chaos theory. Honestly, I thought Farrell’s portrayal of the Corporate Ally was spot on. They {Farrell} often come off cartoonish, but if the billionaires of the world have shown anything, it’s that cartoonish may be too kind. Everyone touched by Patriarchy, whether in reality or Ken-dome eventually suffers. Everyone can oscillate in and out of being a villain in a system that codifies oppression.
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It never occurred to me I wouldn't be the fun parent. A fact my partner has also confessed.


'Fathers' normally have the latitude to do that as the other picks up the slack they give.


When PK started asking for Mama constantly, it messed with my head.
I did everything they did, and even considered myself more patient; but...


I am the first stranger they met.

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